What It’s Really Like Having Sex with Someone Who Has Herpes

What’s it like having sex with someone with herpes?”

There’s a misconception that people with herpes are 1) suddenly devoid of sexuality upon diagnosis, 2) doomed in dating and sex, or 3) constantly have outbreaks so sex is near impossible. (Again all myths and stereotypes).

So what’s the difference when engaging sexually with someone who knows their HSV status, versus someone who has no known symptoms of HSV? I try to break it down in this graphic.

*As with all posts, I feel a need to clarify that this is oversimplified. Please interpret as such and consider how you and your partners may be able to customize this graph*

Sex with partners with herpes:
•may use antivirals
•awareness of and communicate symptomatic outbreaks
•likely more educated on herpes, its stigma, and other STIs
•discuss ways to educate and reduce transmission

Sex with partners with no known herpes:
•may or may not have herpes screening history
•may be HSV+ and asymptomatic or misinterpreted symptoms
•may be uneducated on herpes, its stigma, and other STIs

Both (ideally)…
•discuss barriers and birth control
•communicate boundaries and desires

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What You Might Not Know About Having Sex with Someone Who Has Herpes

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Navigating Intimacy During Herpes Outbreaks: A Guide to Sex and Communication