Unmasking the Shame: Confronting Discomfort Around STIs and Sexual Health
Negative attitudes and discomfort around STIs mask discomfort with our sexual selves.
It’s easy to dismiss someone who has an STI. It’s easy to place a hierarchy between you versus them—most of society does this anyway, right? A ranking game of self-worth amidst collective worthiness when it comes to sexual desire.
Why is talking about sexual health and STIs with partners so “awkward?” Why is regular STI testing frowned upon? Why do we shy away from those who have an STI? Why do shy away from sharing our discomfort with partners, rather than communicate our knowledge (or lack there of) and inexperiences?
Most of the time, people simply don’t know. They weren’t educated. And once someone has a certain set of belief systems in their mind, it’s difficult to confront and change.
Many of us have been lied to (see myths in previous post) by our educators, religious figures, and even our parents. In an effort to shame us out of having pleasurable sexual experiences, we were taught to avoid them through a very specific lens.
We were taught to avoid something so common, yet so stigmatized, that it’s often still unbelievable when we’re presented with fact.
The point between our miseducation and desire for truth will ultimately propel us out of our own levels of internalized sexual shame and into more pleasurable sexual experiences with our partners and ourselves.
Our shame around STIs, and those that test positive for and/or carry them (which is a higher number than most think), is a direct reflection of how we care for our sexual health and sexual selves.