Overcoming Fear of Herpes: From Personal Experience to Education
To be honest, there was a time in my life when I was afraid of herpes, too. Many, if not all, of us have been shrouded in the abstinence-based sex education cloak of lies.
I didn’t have the tools to navigate this dialogue. I didn’t have all of the facts. I wasn’t equipped with the knowledge I teach. All sex education provided me with around herpes and other STIs was stigma.
“But if so many people have it why aren’t they talking about it?” Easy answer, stigma. Complicated answer...
1. They know and are afraid to tell you because they fear rejection.
2. People don’t know that cold sores are herpes! And that oral herpes can be contracted genitally. Thus, they don’t feel obligated to tell you.
3. They don’t get regular STI screenings, are unaware of their herpes status, and have no idea if they’ve even had a herpes test.
4. Sex education didn’t prepare them for navigating and negotiating the realities of partnered sex and exploration of safer passion play.
I understand the initial fear around contracting herpes, but what I will neither comprehended nor respect is willful ignorance.