Navigating Consent in Sexting: Essential Questions for Clear Communication
Sex educators and therapists often express the importance of communicating to sexual partners in the bedroom, but communication about our sexual desires, needs, and boundaries is just as important online.
Sexting requires consent from all parties. Even after consent is obtained, it’s an ongoing, open conversation. Consent is much more complex than just asking someone, “How do you feel about sexting one another?” Or “Can I sext you?” Or avoiding an unsolicited dick pic moment.
This post touches on some of the varying levels of consent and how we can better assess our partners’ boundaries and desires:
1. Do you want to keep this behind the screen, or are you interested in meeting up, too?
2. Do you feel comfortable sending and/or receiving photos and videos?
3. Do you like receiving spontaneous sexts (including photos and videos), or would you prefer not to get sexts during work hours?
4. Are there any words or topics that are off limits for you?
5. What kind of images do you like to receive—if any?
I’m not saying that you have to ask these exact questions to every sexting partner, but I do think they are a helpful outline for navigating expectations of the relationship, what best gets your partners off, and any boundaries.